Kid Ethnic: 103 Days At Sea: Halfie McSpicySkin and the Gastronomical Predictor

Halfie McSpicySkin and the Gastronomical Predictor · 20 September 06

Now back in Japan...

Outside the hip hop club, twenty-somethings talk loud.

Tall British Friend rolls up on a bicycle with a basket. He converses with acquaintances.

Beside them, a local guy on the tipsy side waves and smiles. He’s with two girls who are friends of friends. I don’t know any of them, but I smile and wave back.

The Tipsy Guy points at Tall British Friend. ‘Woah, he’s got a grandma bike!’ he says (in Japanese). I laugh and agree.

‘Yeah, that guy is cool, right? He always rolls that way,’ I say. ‘He’s just a grandma-style guy.’

Tipsy Guy and Co. laugh and laugh. I roll with it.

‘You should see his car. It’s a grandma-style sports car, super cool. Coolest grandma-style car you’ve ever seen.’

As I’m saying this, I realize it’s not actually that funny. But Tipsy Guy and Co. seem to want more.

I add ‘Grandma-style’ to a few other nouns, and soon we have our arms around each others shoulders. I realize that he’s leaning on a crutch, so I shift my weight to the side. He smiles and laughs and laughs.

‘This dude’s really lively!’ he says to his crew. He turns to me. ‘You’re really super lively! You been out drinking tonight? ’

‘Nothing but bottled yoghurt,’ I say. He laughs. I wasn’t joking, but I laugh too.

‘Ha ha! This guy’s great.’ He turns to the girl next to him. ‘And he seems like he would make really good curry.’

Slight pause, as the internal translator double checks that one.

‘Huh?’

‘I was just saying, you look like the kind of guy who could cook up some delicious curry.’

‘Me?’

‘Ha ha, yeah.’

Pause.

‘Um, well, yeah, I guess my curry’s pretty good,’ I say. Which is true, though sometimes I add too much tumeric.

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I’m pretty sure that’s racist.
— andy 1268 days ago #
I’m pretty certain that’s racist, and I wouldn’t have been so nice. Granted, the crux of the problem is that I’m white and have never really experienced racism.
— Mel 1268 days ago #
Nah, that can’t be racist. That’s just a day in the life of kidethnic. And if that mess is racist, then the kid’s whole life has been full of racism, and that doesn’t sound like much fun. So it must just be good ol’ fashion attribution of characteristics based on the color of somebody’s skin.
— Dan 1267 days ago #
Ok, that’s stereotyping.
— andy 1267 days ago #
I just think it’s impressive that you knew the Japanese word for “curry” without having to refer to a dictionary. I suspect that the vast majority of South Carolinians have (a) never heard of “curry” and/or (b) never had it before.

I also believe though that Saleem and his family have been the victims of racism in the past. My wife (then girlfriend) lived with his sister during college and the university she attended sent some paper work to Saleem’s sister and under race they had categorized her as “Mexican” – Saleem, you can’t “cook up some delicious”...nachos can you?
— Michael 1267 days ago #
so, um…when’s your next curry party gonna be anyway?
— Brooke 1267 days ago #
Delicious Curry? Man you’ve come a long way since the days of dipping dry ramen noodles in peanut butter.

For more delicious recipes see http://mattfischer.com/ramen/

surprisingly no relation
— Kevin 1266 days ago #
Don’t believe me, just ask Scott Rubush at www.scottrubush.com
— Kevin 1266 days ago #
Or check out his scary ultra right wing magazine

http://www.frontpagemag.com/index.asp

Yes, I’m hijacking this blog
— Kevin 1266 days ago #
If that’s racism, my friends, then I’m here to say that racism is FUNNY.
— Byzek 1264 days ago #
Ahhh Kevin, always doing the dirty work to amuse us… I love it. A group hijack is ON.
— maggie 1263 days ago #
Byzek, racism is NEVER FUNNY.
Stereotyping is quite funny.
— andy 1261 days ago #
When my nephew was little, he called me Curry.
— Cory 1259 days ago #
Mmmm… yummy.
— Dan 1259 days ago #
WEAVER: Luckily, ‘curry’ in Japanese is just a different pronunciation, like ‘cah-leh’. I can hook up some decent nachos, word.

CORY: That’s the hottest nickname ever.
— saleem 1259 days ago #

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