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Today's Post Contains Bees. And Profanity. · 27 August 04

I stand before you humbled.

Below you will find an excerpt from the English journal of a future student of mine. I have edited it for spelling and hypothesized (in parentheses) as to some of the words necessary to make complete sentences.

But the core awesomeness is purely the work of the student.

The other day a bee made a bee house on my veranda on second floor. I unconcernedly kicked (it, because I) can’t let a thing alone. Wooden container. Fucking many bees attacked me!! If other man was attacked (in such manner) he (would have) died!

After battle, I killed a bee for supper.
See you baby.

What kind of insane bad-ass claims (apropos of nothing) in a purportedly non-fiction second-language journal to have “unconcernedly” initiated a man vs. nature battle that would have killed “other man”? And then claims to have eaten a fresh opponent for supper? And then inexplicably calls his reader “baby”?

How can I teach one who is already so great?

I have not yet met the amazing child who wrote this. But I am 99.73% confident that after befriending him my life will never again be the same.

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  1. Everyone in my office is amused! :)
    — Ela    2717 days ago    #

  2. This is quite possibly the most brilliant Zen koan I’ve ever read. Forget one hand clapping – “I unconcernedly kicked (it, because I) can’t let a thing alone.”

    The self awareness, the unattachment to worldly things – this kid is the Buddha, Sartre and a little west coast gansta rap rolled into one.

    Find him, for he is the One.
    — Jim Ray    2717 days ago    #

  3. Jim’s right. Ask him who killed Pac?
    — joeyb    2711 days ago    #

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    — Tom    2155 days ago    #

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