ALSO BY KID ETHNIC:
100JapaneseThings.com
A collaboration to help folks (and each other) find Japanese stuff:
We post links to/info on fun Japanese things, and little explanations of the Japanese involved.
The Alpaca Song
I wrote and recorded this for you. Because you need a song about alpacas, don’t you?
The Annual Kid Ethnic Valentine
Because I love you so much.
KID ETHNIC IS WRITTEN BY:
saleem
who updates from Japan and sometimes India.
FROM THE START:
The Quarter-Japanese Kid hits up the homeland
Tokyo Silence
I'm Oriented
Tilting Towards Kumamoto
Fish Heads and Public Nudity
Halfie the Half-blood falls off his bike
And furthermore: Halfie the Half-blood Breaks a Chair
I Don't Know if I Like Pippi Longstalkings
Tanboy Eats Fish Eyeball
Japanese Communists are Cuddly
Test Your Halfblood Knowledge!
I Scare Small Children
It Was Like a Cuteworld Abby Road
Today's Post Contains Bees. And Profanity.
Typhoons Will Not Stop Me
The Sun Also Sets
Quick Note: Saleem is Not Dead
CORRECTION: Typhoons Scare Me. Lots.
Watch the Tan Kid Blush
Call for Entries: Name My Kids
The Youth Are Quick and True
Open Letter: To the Breaker at City Hall
Halfie Gets a Verbal Sucker Punch
The Kumamoto Drunken Horse Fest
Japanese Houses Hate Halfie's Head
How to Start Your Japanese Rock Band
Halfie's Personal Dignity on Decline
Japanese Sports Day: I Train Young Warriors
Theory: Three Strange Occurences Per Hour
How to Win an iPod While Dressed as a Typhoon
Winnie the (drunken) Pooh
The Earth Quakes
Collecting Japanese Salmon Sperm
Illiterate at 26
Japan's Children Ignore Homeboy's Toothless Face
Japanese Genius Boy Answers Your Question
Our Students Have Respect . For Nelly.
The Young Boxers
Dear 27% of America (Kid Ethnic Registers)
Please Do Not Attempt to Step to My Japanese Rock Band
Japanese Houses Hate Halfie's Head · 1 October 04
5 quick and painful facts:
1) The average Japanese male is around 5 and a half feet tall.
2) Japanese people construct their houses for Japanese people.
3) I live in a Japanese house.
4) I am 5’11” on a tall day.
5) Wearing your shoes on tatami (a sort of Japanese bamboo carpet) is extremely uncool.
Monday afternoon, I biked home from school to grab some food and get some papers.
Ate some rice, gathered my things, and put on my shoes. Tied one of my massive (by Japanese standards) Vans hi-tops. Realized that I had left some papers on the tatami in my living room.
(I don’t like tying and untying my shoes.)
Hopped back into my living room on my left sock, careful to keep my gigantic dirty shoe off the tatami.
(I am a good hopper.)
Grabbed my papers, and with a might rotating hop, I twisted back toward my apartment hallway.
All of which would have been no problem in my apartment in New York.
Note that in the above photo, I am standing in one of my doorway. Note that I’m not jumping in the picture, nor am I using any tricky angles. Note the distance between my head and the top of the doorframe.
Mid-hop, the right side of my head nailed the doorframe, and my world disappeared for a bit.
I lay on the floor for a long, long time. I kept thinking, “I just need a little nap” then, “no, Saleem, don’t pass out, don’t pass out.” My vision blurred at the edges, like just before a flashback in an 80’s sitcom.
I stayed awake, and I after awhile even stood up. But I swerved an awful lot on my bike ride back to school, and I think I’m a lot stupider now.
So, my apologies if this week’s posts have been incoherent. Please blame my house.
* * *
The Kumamoto Drunken Horse Fest | How to Start Your Japanese Rock Band
Hey, are you interested in doing some corespondence journalism for Seventeen? We need someone to interview young guys (15-20) and take their picture digitally for our famous guys talk section. Let me know. email me at work. cjkirby@hearst.com
ciao!
carli
— Carli 1304 days ago #