ALSO BY KID ETHNIC:
The Whiteboard Videos
Music+Whiteboard Markers+Friends=Good ways to spend weekends
Twitter
I twitter infrequently. But hope we can stay friends.
The Annual Kid Ethnic Valentine
Because I love you so much.
SEAWEED BREAKFAST
A weekly column about Japan for Glimpse.org.
100JapaneseThings.com
A collaborative site to help folks (and each other) find Japanese stuff.
The Alpaca Song
I wrote and recorded this for you. Because you need a song about alpacas, don’t you?
KID ETHNIC IS WRITTEN BY:
saleem
who updates from Japan and sometimes India.
kidethnic@gmail.com
FROM THE START:
The Quarter-Japanese Kid hits up the homeland
Tokyo Silence
I'm Oriented
Tilting Towards Kumamoto
Fish Heads and Public Nudity
Halfie the Half-blood falls off his bike
And furthermore: Halfie the Half-blood Breaks a Chair
I Don't Know if I Like Pippi Longstalkings
Tanboy Eats Fish Eyeball
Japanese Communists are Cuddly
Test Your Halfblood Knowledge!
I Scare Small Children
It Was Like a Cuteworld Abby Road
Today's Post Contains Bees. And Profanity.
Typhoons Will Not Stop Me
The Sun Also Sets
Quick Note: Saleem is Not Dead
CORRECTION: Typhoons Scare Me. Lots.
Watch the Tan Kid Blush
Call for Entries: Name My Kids
The Youth Are Quick and True
Open Letter: To the Breaker at City Hall
Halfie Gets a Verbal Sucker Punch
The Kumamoto Drunken Horse Fest
Japanese Houses Hate Halfie's Head
How to Start Your Japanese Rock Band
Halfie's Personal Dignity on Decline
Japanese Sports Day: I Train Young Warriors
Theory: Three Strange Occurences Per Hour
How to Win an iPod While Dressed as a Typhoon
Winnie the (drunken) Pooh
The Earth Quakes
Collecting Japanese Salmon Sperm
Illiterate at 26
Japan's Children Ignore Homeboy's Toothless Face
Japanese Genius Boy Answers Your Question
Our Students Have Respect . For Nelly.
The Young Boxers
Dear 27% of America (Kid Ethnic Registers)
Please Do Not Attempt to Step to My Japanese Rock Band
[The following dialogue was translated, to the best of my memory and ability, to English from the Japanglish mix we were actually speaking]
The red-faced man leaned in close.
“Now I will tell you a wonderful thing.”
My curiousity, always easily-piqued, was piqued.
“They once made powdered sake.”
“Really?”
“Yes, it was a powder, and it became sake. It was wonderful. But the Japanese did not like the technology. So now it’s hard to find.””
“Wait, you add water, and it made sake?”
“Yes!” His smile grew.
“Was it expensive?”
“No! But the Japanese didn’t like it! They didn’t like the technology! So it’s hard to find!”
You could tell he still couldn’t believe his countrymen’s taste.
“You could bring it anywhere!”
“Wow, anywhere…” I said. His eyes widened.
“We could go to OUTER SPACE and make sake! Amazing! IN OUTER SPACE! Or on the top of a cold mountain! We could go to the TOP OF A COLD MOUNTAIN and MAKE SAKE!”
“Hmmm…” I said.
He looked at my eyes, trying to see if I shared his vision of what the world could be.
“On top of a mountain, making a picnic. And sake!” he said.
He paused and broke out laughing. “We could make sake UNDER THE OCEAN! IN THE SEA!”
“Woah.” It was, I had to admit, an unusual idea, this under-sea sake-making.
“I think it could be a great business in America. American people would like it. You should introduce it there. You could make a lot of money.”
A man across the table inquired as to what we were talking about. The red-faced man explained in rapid Japanese.
“Yes,” the man across the table said. “You should bring that to America.”
* * *
The Temple Does Not Want Your Mutants | It's Navitime in Pompadourland
Keith
— another envious Protestant 1518 days ago #
— alexandra 1518 days ago #
Hmmmm.... Is America’s post-Kool-Aid-powder generation primed for the Sake Dust switch?
Logo designers and investors welcome. Bring it on, kids.
Your friend,
Saleem
— saleem 1516 days ago #
— sake bather 1513 days ago #
— Glen 1511 days ago #
SakeStix (Big tobacco route) Package the magic dust in pixistix containter, will mix in the mouth…the ultimate sake one hitter for the kids.
SakeDrop: (Technology) Little insta-dissolve pill to drop in soda cans—giving you that sake wine cooler with your favorite caffinated bubbly beverage.
SakeShake: (Health Buffs) Mix the sake sand with some spirutin protien powder, perhaps some Ginko and a touch of St. Johns Wort for the added good feelings. Your sakeshake will leave you feeling happy, refreshed, recharged, and just a little tipsy to keep the chorestrol levels at bay.
HotSake: (Transform the American Japanese market) Mix wasabi powder with the sake powder. Call it ‘HotSake’. The rest writes itself.
— ayman 1511 days ago #
Ayman: That’s the kind of work and dedication that I like to see.
— saleem 1509 days ago #